All the Small Things
Dream Big sweatshirt gifted by Ashleigh from her Zyia store. Check her out on Instagram.
Sometimes dreaming big isn’t about those out of reach high in the sky goals. But about the every day things you take for granted. Growing up, I never lost a close loved one. My grandparents, save one who I don’t remember meeting, all lived into their 80s. My mom had breast cancer in her late 30s but almost 40 years later, she is considered more than cured. My dad is looking at a knee replacement this month (keep him in your prayers) but it’s only just slowed him down. Not all are that lucky.
Lately it’s struck me how much of a gift it is to grow old. And, to grow old with the people you love. The last couple years have been a struggle. I went through a hard time while pregnant with my fourth. From health to friendships, it was a hard year. I learned a lot about myself and my relationships from friends to family. Loss doesn’t just happen through death but the termination of any relationship leaves an imprint on your heart. Last year, I lost the first person I never expected to lose (he should have outlived me by far) in one of the hardest ways possible. In a way, I am lucky, I was 34 years old.
Lately, I feel surrounded by those who aren’t so fortunate. Mothers who never held their baby. Families who lost little sisters. Spouses left without a partner. Friends who have to say goodbye too soon.
Every night, I think of those touched by tragedy as it seems like I am surrounded by it (maybe that’s just life as you age?). I pray for them. I pray for my loved ones. And, I thank God for every day I have with all of them. There is no bigger dream than to grow old surrounded by the ones you love.